11/30/20
“Crooked Views”
By Joseph Anthony Grisanzio
*These Blogs are “my truths!” I stake no logistical claims, nor research to support my opinions and experiences.
I was born in 69’ … “Hey Technology, give me a break!”
Are you on the Tech cusp? Old enough to be confused, frustrated, or not give a shit, by/about it? Young enough that you are familiar and utilize it, partially for want, mostly for need? In this piece, I will explore both sides of that coin, share my experience, and touch upon the middle-aged Embracers and Rejectors. As I proclaim regularly, at my exceedingly early onset of frustration with technology, “you wouldn’t hire an IT person to build you a brick patio.” Sure, there might be some loophole there, but for the most part, you would not!
God knows, Contractors can have a bevy of excuses, which delay the project or raise the price. Overall, however, the Contractor is told the goal, gathers the materials/workers and begins the job themselves…because they are Brick Layers, etc. They don’t tell you, “you can do this yourself, but first you’ll need to get the bricks. Oh, there’s a new type of bricks you must now use, and you have to make these bricks yourself from scratch — but I can’t give you the directions to do that. Then, I’m going to need you to take a two-hour safety class and there’s a secret Indonesian password that gets you into the class BUT, if you don’t say it in a perfect Indonesian accent, they will lock the doors of the class on you. Oh geez, I forgot to tell you there’s a new type of mortar that must be used with this new type of bricks, that you’ve made. Wait a minute … this patio is meant for a Ranch house, not a Split level … oh boy”, and so on! One week later, at your particularly important party, your guests are standing in the mud, because you still do not have a brick patio. Because you had to do it all yourself, did not have the knowledge, and could not finish the job — instead of using someone who is trained, experienced, and knows what the hell they are doing! You get the point, and if not, the point is, that the so-called simplicity of using technology, is a never-ending onion peeling, that ends up consuming your life, making you the IT person (instead of an actual IT person), and taking you down so many dark hallways, that this task you set out to do — to simplify your life — has now become a full-time job pushing you further and further from your once simple goal. Why? Because not everyone is meant to be a *computer expert.
*I will use the term computers quite often, because I am a young-old man, and we call (or curse) all technology as “the computer!”
I do not understand the assumption that we are supposed to have all this knowledge ourselves. It can be complicated stuff and behind the scenes, the real Tech Wizards are constantly changing and updating software and information, unbeknownst to the User, who ultimately does not want an education. We JUST want to point and click. If not (and if you are like me), before long you find yourself longing for the days of pen, paper, and rotary dial phones! Just at the point of frustration, the Embracers come in, who are your age-based equal, and say, “why don’t you just use blah blah blah … and just do it yourself, it’s so easy and you’ll save money!” They always leave out the part that they had the patience (or not, as we weren’t there for their enlightenment) to spend hours and hours of their precious lives to learn this ten-second click-click task, that has now elevated them to the ranks of Software Engineer, Audio Technician, Website Creator, Video Editor, Digital Photographer, Excel Spreadsheet Expert … and so on!
Technology is an amazing thing, but who has the time and why would you want to learn so very much when you’re halfway to the grave in this life and come from a generation that used Rabbit Ears for a Wi-Fi signal and Plyers as a remote control. And if you are under forty-five years old and reading this and do not understand the references, go to the Library, and pick up a copy of Time magazine. A magazine is something you …. OH, NEVER MIND!
Now, though I do have disdain for *the computer, I am also not as much of a dinosaur, as I label myself to be. With each task or project, in fact, I learn (more often than not) that the so-called Tech Savvy people/Computer or phone lovers, do not know that much at all! Am I a genius or do I just lack the interest in getting an education for a field where I will never derive a paycheck? Those in the supposed know, just seem to have more of a comfort level with their devices (aka they don’t have the desire to constantly smash them against a wall or throw their phones into a very fast-moving river) and are fascinated by the pretty colors (sarcasm) or are curious about the never-ending information … i.e. “wow, when I do this, then that happens!” God bless the patient and inquisitive with no other pending agendas, for I am not in that demographic.
I was born in 1969 and though I am not as old, in theory, as others in my generation, who really do not understand the computer! They are often clueless and moreover scared of possible outcomes associated with experiments. They’ll spew phrases such as, (insert backwoods Southern accent here if it helps the image) “I hate these computers,” when what they are really saying is, I’m too old for this shit and I don’t want to try new things. But, on an emphatic level, when I’m told, “you’re still young,” or technology is a must for survival, I think about the fact that I entered the world in the year of: our first human moon landing, Woodstock, the Beatles last public appearance, the Manson Family murders, the debut of the 747 aircraft and the Pontiac Trans Am … HELL, the Jets won a Super Bowl, do you really need more of a benchmark of my ancestry than that?
So yes, I get the necessity. I understand it more than many my age and certainly more than I give myself credit for. But my credo stands — Get in and Get out! In the Stand-Up Comedy world, it is known as show up and throw up. I’ve done countless private parties and events over the years, it has literally become an integral part of my income, and yet, after 31 years, I still have not purchased a sound system (constantly borrowing or renting) nor am I barely confident of where to plug the microphone into the speaker. Social Media is the barometer of my industry today and embracing it, haunts me. Websites and profiles (not excluding this Blog) are essential to express ideas and as marketing tools and I always refer them to friends or professionals. I still use a pen and paper, and my fire hazard of a home office is proof of this because I was born in 69’ and I beg technology to give me a break!
